I have one child. Just one. And as I stand right now at this point in my life that is the way I intend it to stay. Now I will wait a moment while you form an opinion.
I don't intend to write my reasoning behind my decision. In fact I am actually sick of stating them.
I have come across many people in my life who love having a big family, some who, like me, think one is perfect and I know plenty of woman in committed relationships that swear children are not for them at all.
But no matter what category you fall into there is someone out there questioning you, judging you, and you will know who most of them are because they will come right out and say it.
I don't know why society seems to think that this is a discussion that is perfectly fine outside the family circle. It seems likes as soon as people find out you are married or have one child the first question is "When are you going to have a baby?" Asking this question of people has never come to my mind!
They are big decisions that should never be made lightly or on the spot and any reasoning behind them do not need to be put on the spotlight from anyone outside the close knit family circle. Some people ask and then move on once it is answered. Sort of an icebreaker, making conversation, "how about last night's game, " situation.
Others not so much.
I have argued, on several occasions, my point of view on having one child for 20 minutes with people I have just met.
The one point that always comes to my mind is what if I could not have more children? Do people think I would want to explain that day in and day out? I really feel for those in that situation.
Maybe people are really having a hard time financially and could not take on the expense of another baby even though they would love too.
There could be medical issues to consider. There are many reasons for people to think twice about asking about someone's parenting plans.
I have often felt as if I have been made out to be the bad parent simply because I did not think to add another child to my family so Charlotte would not be alone. It is the one thing that someone should never be able to do, make me second guess my love and dedication to providing a well-adjusted life to Charlotte.
On the other side of the spectrum there are people that get criticized for having what some consider to be too many children.
So I guess we all need to follow the standard 2.5 average children per household to escape the questions that are bound to come. All I ask people is to consider what the person you are grilling on childbearing is really feeling about answering a truly personal question.
Until then, my uterus; my business.